Promises
by NeonTiger5
Summary: The first thing Alison feels upon seeing Beth again, alive and breathing, isn't confusion or anger or any of those other predictable emotions. It's irritation. When Beth turns up at her back door at eleven thirty at night, she takes one look at her and sees Sarah.


The first thing Alison feels upon seeing Beth again, alive and breathing, isn't confusion or anger or any of those other predictable emotions. It's irritation. When Beth turns up at her back door at eleven thirty at night, she takes one look at her and sees Sarah.

It isn't until she's let her in and demanded to know what on earth she wants at this hour and whirled around to find her stood stock still and staring at her, really looking in a way that Sarah never has. It's the way Beth used to look at her, calm and searching and comforting all at once. It's Beth.

After that there aren't many words, or thoughts for that matter other than the all-encompassing tidal wave of relief that crashes over Alison at the sight of the woman before her. This shouldn't be real, it shouldn't be happening. Beth was dead, _is_, still supposed to be dead. Sarah saw her throw herself in front of that train. But she's here in Alison's house, dishevelled and slightly thinner than she remembers, but it's Beth and Alison isn't going to question it for too long lest it all turns out to be some kind of cruel dream after all.

All at once Alison surges towards Beth, clinging tight and only relaxing when Beth engulfs her in the same strong, warm embrace that Alison still remembers (never really forgot).

For a long time neither of them speak, content to just feel and breathe each other in again. The hows and the whys can wait until later, until they've regained themselves and each other and there are no longer tears soaking into the collar of Beth's shirt.

xxxx

After two cups of tea and a quick check to make sure Donnie still isn't home and Gemma and Oscar are sleeping they finally settle down at the table in the basement and Beth braces herself for the expected onslaught of questions. The first to come tumbling from Alison's lips, choked and still a little hoarse, is the one Beth was expecting.

"How Beth? How are you here?"

Beth set about explaining her story, revealing a whole string of events Alison had never known about before Beth disappeared. How after the Maggie Chen shooting Beth knew that the woman's friends were close on her heels and there was a great threat that Beth could unwittingly lead them straight to Alison and her children.

"I swore I'd protect you once, do you remember?"

Of course she remembered, how could she ever forget that moment. The two of them alone out in the field where they used to practice their shooting. In the dead of the night under the stars with Beth's arms tight around her waist she whispered those words almost silently against her ear. It seemed a life time ago now.

Beth continued to explain what happened, how she knew she had to run and hide, to leave Alison to keep her promise. It was pure luck that while fruitlessly searching for a way to disappear, Beth was contacted by another clone. A French woman referred to her by Katja and suffering from the same disease that was slowly crippling the German too.

Alison listened in horror as Beth described how this woman, this stranger, knowing that she had but weeks left to live in agony as her lungs slowly failed her, threw herself under a train as her last act of kindness. A way for Beth to live, and to disappear.

"But you came back" said Alison finally, a look of shock still etched on her face "you could have stayed away and stayed safe, why did you come back? Why now?"

"For you. It was always for you Ali. I only left to keep you, and your kids, safe. Not me. And now, well, you don't seem so safe any more anyway"

Alison was lost for words for the moment. Beth faked her own death, gave up on her entire life and everyone she ever knew just to protect her. How could anyone, least of all Donnie, ever match up to that?

"I hear you've made friends while I was gone though?" said Beth, immediately chuckling wryly at the confused look Alison gave her in response "I might've been dead Ali but I've never been far. I know all about my replacement, Miss Manning, should I be worried?"

She laughed again louder at the scandalised gasp she received in answer.

"No! And they aren't to known about this, us, either. They don't know what happened between us and that's how it's staying for now. Sarah would be insufferable."

"Oh come on Alison, do you seriously believe that Cosima never knew what was going on? Can we at least let them know I'm not dead? Even if Sarah _is_ the one living my life at the moment"

"Yes, but this, stays between us" Alison said with a gesture between the two of them.

"Fine" Beth sighed. She wasn't after all, expecting miracles just yet, up until an hour ago Alison had still assumed her to be dead. Who could blame her for being cautious?

xxxx

Keeping the relationship between them a secret turned out to be a lot harder than either of them had anticipated. Everyone else took surprisingly well to the news that Beth Childs was in fact very much alive and well, admittedly with a little shamefaced embarrassment on Sarah's part. Cosima on the other hand was over the moon and far beyond when she learnt of the news over one of their many skype calls and she quickly flew into a full Cosima-style, hands flailing everywhere, interrogation of where Beth had been and what had happened to her. Once they all knew though, it became much harder to keep what was going on a secret. Especially with Beth staying at Felix's flat from a lack of other places to go. Staying in the place that had once been her home ran the risk of running into Paul and that was the last thing she wanted when newly back from the dead.

It therefore meant a whole lot of carefully dancing around Donnie and Alison's kids at her house and taking what little time they could get when both Felix and Sarah were out of the flat.

But curled up beneath warm sheets with Alison in her arms, her head resting against her chest and still breathing hard, none of it mattered. It no longer seemed to matter that Beth had faked her own death, that she had to hurt Alison the way she had, that they couldn't get more than five damn minutes alone any more. None of it mattered. Because she was back now, she still had Alison and she made a second promise to herself then and there with her heart very much alive and beating in her chest. She was never leaving again.


End file.
